I am having a hard time lately. I don't want to cry. I don't want to be confused anymore. I need direction. I want to know that I am going the right way.
I want to move now. Some direction. I know what I want for the next few years of my life.
Im in school. Hoping to get my BA in Applied Psychology. Then enter an MA program for Counseling.
I want Nevaeh to go to preschool next year, and take swimming lessons.
I also want to adopt a kid.
I know Im single. But I really want to. I have done alot of research. I hope to start saving money soon. And one day by the time im.... 35.. have adopted a child.
These are all wants. Now I just need the push and OK from God.
Then in life right now there are so many obstacles. How do I over come them? There is so much that makes me want to cry. So much sorrow. Will this sorrow become joy in the end?
Will it drive me to listen to God, to do what my hearts desires are... ?
I also want to scream and cry. I want to lay out on a clear night and watch the stars like I used to .. I want to be as sure about life as I used to be.
There are so many wants...
God, what is it that you want from me?
Please yell at me. Cuz for now, I am so human.. I'm just living in my own world.. following my own two feet.
1 comment:
I know how you feel. I struggle with the same things.sounds like you have some good plans though! It's always one step at a time, one moment at a time...and try not to look back to often at what could have been or what went wrong...unless there is something to learn from it for your good!
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